April 17th

When I die I want

my body to feed the earth

trees born inside me

I was thinking today, how cremation seems such a waste. I’d like to be buried so what nutrients I contained be returned to the earth, seeds germinating in what was the shell of my body. Obviously only when I’m dead, I’d be quite frightened if I was buried alive.

I think a combination of reading Murakami, the rainy cold change in the weather and listening to Mogwai in the car has contributed to these thoughts. But it’s not negative in the slightest, not an obsession with death, just an observation. Tomorrow I might think about Houmous or South London. Could be anything.

April 16th

A half moon and stars

memories incubating

in the wells dark depths

 

No spoilers, but Murakami’s “Wind up bird chronicle” is oppressively compelling.

March 30th

Everything will die

Lanterns lit for old loved ones

Cut flowers wilting

 

I’m reading a novel by the Japanese writer Haruki Murakami, the Wind-up Bird Chronicle. I’ve only just started it, but it’s like nothing I’ve read before. It’s very existential in its approach, written in the first person, the main character seemingly blunders around, trying to make sense of life through a series of surreal encounters. It has a sense of impeding tragedy about it, it feels lonely, detached. I feel sad reading it. But it’s very compelling. Little acts, little descriptions all seem to weigh heavy with significance. Today’s Haiku really has nothing to do with what I’ve read of the book so far, other than it was inspired by it in terms of the unsettled feeling within me as I read on.

If I was forced to look for and pin some meaning to it, it might be that the thought of giving someone cut flowers always has troubled me. They are a gift which is either dead or dying. They may open up, they may fill the room with colour, but ultimately they will brown and die and there is little you can do about it. Much better a pot plant! If you kill that, then you’re just flippin’ useless (or the plant detested being around you)